My "Thanksgiving" Post

I love this time of the year...once Halloween is over, there is so much to look forward to; great food, decorations, parties, music, and a time for reflection. I decided this year's Thanksgiving post will be dedicated to my favorite memories, the one's I am so GRATEFUL for having! :)

SHALENE'S TOP TEN MOST GRATEFUL MEMORIES

First Five Will Be From This Year...and the Rest From Other Years

1. College of Education 2012 Outstanding Student Achievement Recipient: It's hard to find words to adequately express how much it meant to me to receive this award. It was as if all my hard-work, dedication, exhaustion, extra loads of work, and time spent to serve ISU and the College of Education wasn't in vain...that they truly appreciated me. The night I received the award will forever be in my mind along with all the memories of my hard-work leading up to it.   
2. Mexico Riviera Cruise 2012: Not very many people can say that they went on a cruise with 20 of their friends, but I am lucky enough to say that.  Nights spent dancing to the music sung by a fabulous Asian couple, Karaoke, singing along with a Mariachi Band, near death experience riding an ATV with my brother, jet skiiing, talking with locals, eating more than I should, the Piano Bar, and endless sun-bathing are just a few of the memories that I will cherish from this trip...but the best memory...sharing it with some of my best-est friends!       
3. ReDoing My Own Furniture: Now I know this is a weird memory, but I am so proud of my furniture in my little apartment. I spent hours working to strip paint away on my family's antique bed frame, painting furniture, shopping and rummaging around antique shops, the attic and the basement, and then fixing up stuff to just rough it up...I loved the whole process and seeing the finished product at the end. It made everything worth it. The best part of this was me finding a passion and a hobby. I love home decor and fixing up furniture. 
4. My Best Friend Being Sealed: A couple weekends ago I had the privilege to see one of my best friend's Melissa French, be sealed for time and all eternity. It was one of the those special moments in life that one can say truly felt heaven and the love God has for his children.  When I saw how beautiful and happy my childhood friend was, I cried for joy. I am so proud of her for living her life in accordance so that she could be sealed in the temple and appreciate her friendship and example. I am also grateful for knowledge that families can be together forever and one day I too will be able to experience this special blessing myself and be sealed to a man who love the Lord and this gospel as much as I do. 
5. Teaching:Never in my life have I ever worked so hard. For those of you who think teaching is a 8:00am-4:00pm job you are so wrong. My life revolves around lesson plans, grading, extra-curriculars, discipline, and never-ending stress. I would be dishonest if I say that I love every second of it, because quite frankly I don't. But there are a few moments that make life bearable. Memories of my students drawing pictures for me that say, "To My Favorite Teacher," "I Love You Ms. Summers," or times when they come up to me and say "This is my favorite class!" Memories of when a student said she tweeted Zac Efron saying he needs to meet and marry Ms. Summers. I'm so grateful for these small moments to help me see the bigger picture.
6. Wicked: Christmas Break 2009, I had the opportunity to go out and visit my brother Stephen and his family in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. The week that I was there is a memory I will cherish forever! I loved every second of it from; playing on Carter's Thomas the Train bed, New Year's Eve party at a stranger's house...but I guess it was a big deal of a party, doing Tara's hair and makeup almost every day, seeing Milwaukee and Chicago..and one of the best parts- seeing Wicked in Chicago! I loved getting dressed up all fancy, going out to eat and spending the night with Tara, not only my sis-in-law, but my confidant, therapist and friend. The play was amazing and afterwards I got to meet the cast, get autographs and pictures- it was a night I will never forget!   
7. Memorial Day With Just Dad and Me: When I was 13 years old my dad and I spent an entire Memorial Day together. Just him and I. I wonder if he knows how much that day means to me. When I was 13, I was awkward with low self-esteem,  friendless and absolutely dreading facing Middle School day after day. The whole day, my dad told me family stories, past down for generations, stories about his own childhood and the one thing I needed to hear, he told me how grateful he is to have me as his daughter. I have never  forgot those words, stories and memories from that day; cheese curds from the cheese factory, hamburgers, and walking up and down cemetaries searching family headstones, but just spending the day with my dad. My 13-year old self needed that day, and for years I will remember it. 
8. Childhood Birthday Parties: I'm cheating on this one and grouping these memories into one. My mom is all about themes- and because of that, she is an awesome, creative genius! My childhood birthday parties have always been some of the best on the block. From the invites, to the food, everything revolved around the theme. She is so creative! Just to give you an idea, here are a few of my b-day parties; Wizard of Oz with Ruby-Red glittered slipper invites, bubbles and a multi-colored cake, A Movie-Star night with a fashion show that had spot-lights and a run way, Camping theme, tents set up, camp games...the whole kit and kaboodle, and a tea party with friends and our dolls, that even included a "limo" (car with a sign on it)! Each birthday included so much work, effort, time and money and by doing this...my mom truly made me feel special. 
9. Disaster Zone Clean Up: Before you think one thing, this title of this memory involves cleaning my room. I didn't say all memories were positive, but I did say that I am grateful for all of them. I was 8 years old and my room was literally a disaster zone. I had garbage bags full of crap under my bed, boxes filled with broken or old toys in my closet and every inch of the floor was covered with clothes, barbies, or old food. It's normal for kids to be messy, and most often you clean your room to only get it dirty again...but this day was different. It all began with my mom on a hunt for the Woody and Buzz Light-year dolls and she just knew it was somewhere in my room. No matter how much I denied seeing them in there, she began her mad hunt that included gutting out everything! We spent hours on my room; there were tears, yelling, throwing away about 85% of my stuff, and at the end of it all, not only were the dolls found...but I learned to become a neat-freak. It's funny, this process happened every other month with my siblings, but they returned to their old ways of mess. I on the other hand, still have the strong memories of that day and I never want to see my mom like that ever again! 
10. Weekend at Grandma's: When I was 10 years old, my little sister and I got to spend a weekend at my Grandma and Grandpa Brower's house. I remember after we picked raspberries, she laid out a blanket on the grass and read out of my "Mandy's Garden" book to us for hours. We laughed as she told us stories about her childhood and about my mom's childhood. She let me hold some of her precious tea sets. (This year she gave me her first tea set she owned as a young child, her oldest one.) That weekend my little sister and I followed her around the house, helping her with chores, running errands, watching Shirley Temple movies and playing games with her. I am so grateful for that weekend, but more importantly I am grateful for all of my grandparents- each one has made a huge impact on my life and have always been such a huge support. 

I loved how one memory made me think of another...these are only ten memories and my life and there are so many more that I cherish. I am so grateful for each member of my immediate and extended family, I am grateful for all of my friends, I am grateful for my education and leadership experience. I have so much in my life to be grateful for and I owe it all to my loving Heavenly Father and His son, Jesus Christ. I am grateful to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I know this gospel is true and I love it with all of my heart. There is so much in this life to be grateful for and I appreciate this time of the year to reflect on it. 

Here are a few pictures taken from a photography session I won. I am very impressed with the photographer. She is a miracle worker! Crappy rain/snow, freezing weather and of course working with what little I got. haha! Definitely a fun experience! 

"I hope they call me to....Temple Square!"

Tonight, I was on the phone with my 10 year old niece. We were talking about me going on a mission. I asked her if she would miss me and write to me while I was gone. She asked how long I would be gone for, I reminded her that girls go out for 18 months and guys 24 months. She sat there quietly for a few seconds and in a very serious tone said, "Shalene, I am going to write to President Monson and ask if you can be one of the sister missionaries at Temple Square in SLC...then you would only be 20 minutes away from my house and I could come visit you everyday!" After chuckling for a minute and telling her that in fact, Temple Square has been one of those missions I would love; especially giving tours of President Young's, the Beehive House! I told her of a story that happened when I was 13 years old, our family had gone to Temple Square and I announced that I wanted to go on a mission there. My older brother Scott was quick with his response and said that only the good-looking sisters were sent there. And unfortunately, me being the awkward, crooked teeth, acne-ridden girl that I was at the time...would be sent elsewhere. After telling Jocelyn this, she quickly responded, "Shalene, that's not true, I've seen ugly sisters there- so you CAN go there!" Can't quit laughing...out of the mouths of babes!

"Oh, the Places You'll Go!"

"You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go."- Dr. Seuss

            Dr. Seuss...it still amazes me that a children's author can teach such profound lessons. Along with his works and Roald Dahl's, I was thoroughly prepared for adulthood. 

I have decided to dedicate this blog posting to Dr. Seuss' work, "Oh, the Places You'll Go!" The opening page begins with the above quote. I have always loved this quote, because it is so true, I am the one and only person who decides where I go... After graduation I had no real clear idea with what I wanted to do with my life. I decided I would take my first step towards the most obvious pathway; teaching. (It makes sense, right- that is what I got my degree in!) I went into teaching hearing the expression that you either "sink or swim"...I now, however disagree, teaching is a profession where you are just trying to stay afloat! I have never worked so hard, been more exhausted (physically and mentally) or have put so much of myself into it. Many teachers say that they do "it" for the students and I agree 100%. I love my kids- sure, I have a few rowdy ones I wouldn't be too upset if they were absent...but overall, I love them. 

-I love hearing "Ms. Summers."

-I love walking into MY classroom. 

-I love that my students tease me about my crush on Zac Efron. (And give me gifts with his picture on           it!) 

-I love hearing that I am their favorite teacher or that my class is their favorite. 

-I love hearing from other students that they are excited to have me next semester, because they have heard how "cool" I am from the other kids. 

It is these simple things that get me through all the rough days and all the crap that teachers put up with.  

"I'm sorry to say so but, sadly, its' true that Bang-ups and Hang-ups can happen to you. You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch." 

My degree prepared me to create lessons, to adapt and modify, manage a classroom, make learning fun...but it also taught me a naive understanding of an idealistic education system. The harshest reality that I have had to face, is the fact that our education system is failing our students. I feel that it is a competition between schools. Students are simply learning to take tests. Teachers are unappreciated and slowly being replaced by computers. And students are not receiving the grades that they really did earn.  This list, unfortunately, could go on and on. BUT, although "bang-ups and hang-ups can happen..." I am trying to focus on what really matters, the students. I went into education thinking that I would be superman (or woman) and take it by storm. Reality has sat in...naivety out the window.  I have never worked harder, been stressed out more, lacked sleep, had so much pressure placed upon my shoulders, nor been reminded so much that I may not be that superwoman, but I am a teacher...and I will do all within my power to make a difference in the lives of my students.

Now, with that said...lately, I have felt that something is missing in my dull, boring life. Sure, your thinking...a husband! Yeah, that would be nice, and I will gladly welcome that opportunity when and if it comes. But I was thinking along the lines of serving an LDS mission. I have always had that deserve within my heart to serve the Lord and share the gospel with others. I have loved the opportunities that I have had in my life, thus far in sharing the gospel with friends and family, and yearn for a deeper commitment and sacrifice to share the gospel full-time. 

With prayers being answered, I know that this is the next step and pathway that I am to take in my life. All of life's blessings, challenges and directions have prepared me and led me up to this point. The plan right now is to put in my papers the beginning of March, and maybe get my call around my birthday which is the 13th. (That would be a fun birthday present!) With the news of allowing sisters to go out at 19 and the men at 18, I will probably be the old-fuddie duddie in the mission. But I don't care! I have preparing my whole life for that moment and I will serve the Lord with all of my heart! 

Life is full of paths, "some you will say, I don't choose to go there...and you may not find any you'll want to go down...You'll get mixed-up, of course as you already know." Although, I have no clear plans for my future; five, ten...even three years down the road, I do however have something to work  towards. Today, I am a teacher. And "tomorrow"I will be a missionary for the Lord. 

A Few of my Favorite Things....

Today I have been thinking a lot of how I need to vocalize my gratuity more. There are so many things that I am grateful for, so to shorten this quick little blog post, I decided to do a Top 10. (Don't really focus on the order of grateful things...)

Top Ten 

"A Few of my Favorite Things"

10. My health. Funny though, because as I write this I am laying in bed, sick with a virus- like cold thing. BUT, I am so grateful that I have a healthy body that enables me to do whatever I wish. However, I do need to exercise and take better care of it- Goal?

9. Grecian Key and El Herradero. These two restaurants are my favorite. I never branch out and I always order "my usual" go-to meals; Euro with a side of curly fries (Grecian Key) and from El Herradero, a bean and cheese burrito with a side of rice. YUM!

8. The Wizard of Oz. This is one of my favorite movies- In fact I am watching it right now! This movie always makes me smile. I love the music, the characters and the storyline. I just adore it. This movie always makes me feel better.

7. Musicals. If only my life could be like a musical....I'm sure it would Tony winning! The drama, the romance, the comedy, and the lead- wow, amazing! jk! My life is really quite boring, but I do wish people would just jump up and start singing and dancing in public every once in a while. Oh and I do love "Happily Ever Afters..."

6. Leadership Experiences. I am so grateful for all of my opportunities to be a leader. Each position has brought growth, responsibility, and my favorite, the opportunity to meet and work with people. Church callings, Senior Class President, Ambassadors, COE Senator and ASISU Chief of Staff are a few examples of positions that brought about tons of work and stress...but I wouldn't have changed it for all the money in the world.

5. Teaching. I have always had a knack to teach. I love standing in front of a classroom and talking about things I have a passion for. It always makes for a great day when you can tell students are enjoying being there, or thank you after the lesson. All the hard-work and sleepless nights, become worth it.

4. Historical Museums/Sites. I love history, especially history that has been preserved. Some of my favorite vacations have been to historical sites like forts, mansions, or ghost towns. A year ago I had an amazing opportunity to do an internship at the Museum of Idaho and help with their WWII exhibit (which is my favorite time in history). I was able to learn about all the artifacts, and even got to handle them! It was an absolute dream come true! I loved going to work everyday- especially when I was able to give tours and talk about each artifact and how it played into history.

3. Friends. I have some amazing friends. I am one lucky girl- I am not one to say, "oh that's an acquaintance" or "someone I know,"  but I firmly believe that once I have met and gotten to know even a little bit about someone then they are my friend. I have friends from all walks of life, different ages and experiences, and friends ranging from one spectrum to the other- and I genuinely love spending time with them and am so grateful for their role in shaping who I am.

2. Family. I love my family. My family has been such a hug support to me, all of my life. They are my go-to for advice, a pick-me-up when I'm having a sad day, or there to make me laugh. I am so grateful to be born into this family...it was a perfect fit and I couldn't be anymore happier to spend eternity with them.

1. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This my my number one for a reason, my religion is my everything. I am who I am because of the knowledge I have of my relationship with my Heavenly Father and my Savior, Jesus Christ. I know that I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father. I know that my Savior, Jesus Christ, atoned and died so that I may be able to return to live with him and my Father in Heaven one day. I know that this is His church and that all His keys and ordinances have been restored upon the Earth, as they once were when Jesus lived upon the Earth. I know that the Bible is true and that the Book of Mormon is another testament to Jesus Christ and that by working together one can find true happiness and have the full picture of Christ's life. Both books are true and I am grateful that I can pray to my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and know that through any question I ask- I may be given an answer. I am so grateful for temples to be upon the Earth and to have one so close. The blessings that one receives while in the temple, truly are a gift from Heaven. I am grateful for the power of the priesthood, and have witnessed many miracles and blessings that have strengthened my love and understanding of this gospel. I know that Thomas S. Monson is a true prophet, like the prophets from ancient times, he stands as a witness that our Savior does live and that our Heavenly Father still communicates with His children today. I know without a doubt that this church is true. My life has been blessed so much because of it. My testimony is strong and I will forever stand as a witness.

In life, we have our ups and downs. We have our good days and our bad days. It is important to remember that everyone has something to be grateful for.  You don't need to write it down like I did, but we should ponder every once in a while a few of our favorite things and what blessing we have been given.

"Two Roads Diverged in a Yellow Wood"

Lately, I have been feeling overwhelmed. Overwhelmed with choices and then trying to find comfort in my decisions. Life is full of the "what ifs," but I have decided that once choices are made, I must go forward with faith and confidence, looking towards the future...not dwelling on the "maybes" or "could have beens."

This was my facebook status I had a few days ago. After much pondering and stewing over the thought of posting such a comment on facebook, since it bother's me all of the negative "wooh is me...my life sucks" type of statuses, I decided that this realization hit me hard and helped that maybe it would help others. I've heard that people make the most lasting and life-alternating decisions while in their 20's, I would agree-whole heartedly! Within the last year I have felt that my life has led to many decisions. I have become envious of people who "just know" what they are supposed to do, or who they are supposed to date or marry or what their calling in life is...in fact, I hate people who's life just works out for them! jk! I don't hate anyone, but like I said, I am super jealous! 

A few months ago I took a job offer to teach, I felt really good about the job and was excited (and terrified) to start on this journey. But while on my cruise to Mexico, it hit me...I really want to serve and LDS mission. The desire to serve a mission has always been there, but the urgency to serve was really quite a surprise when it crept up on me. Now, some would say...THEN GO! Well.....signing my contract to teach and give that binding word is a big deal to me. Also, a few more factors have fallen into play since my cruise. I got an apartment, signed a lease for 6 months, became and will be indebted to my parents till October when I get my 1st paycheck, and only have a few hundred dollars to my name- making that $8,000 short of paying for a mission. So needless to say, the timing couldn't be more wrong and making it impossible to serve. If life just magically worked out, I would leave tomorrow, but life isn't that easy...my life is complicated. So this is where my facebook status comes into play. After much praying and pondering, I came to the conclusion that I made all of these decisions, and now I need to stick by them and look towards the future with them. No longer will I say, "what if?" or "maybe..." The plan now is to teach for a year; pay back parents, earn money, enjoy being back in Poky with friends, live it up with the family (make great memories), prepare myself physically and spiritually to serve a mission, put in my papers in February or early March and leave June or July to serve the Lord. 

So that's it...it took a long time to get to this point, but I finally feel that comfort and peacefulness once again. I truly am excited for this year, I know I will grow a lot and learn tons. Teaching will help prepare me to work hard, work with others, set goals and the big one: just plain teaching others. After this year of waiting and anticipation, I will be ready for my mission. Nothing is stopping me!*

(Disclaimer: Obviously there may be some roadblocks that hinder me going on a mission. Just know that I AM going...it may be in the next life or later on in my life! p.s. Some say marriage may be a possibility, to those "some" it may be...but unless I am totally swept off my feet, if I allow that to even happen- I highly doubt that excuse will keep me home.) 

Toodle-loo, Adios, Au revoir, Auf Wiedersehen, Sayonara, Ciao

Another Year Older and Wiser Too....?

"Happy birthday to me....Happy Birthday to me...Happy Birthday Dear Shalene...Happy birthday to ME!" Well ladies and gentlemen, I am officially 23 years old! Woo-hoo! ;)

Lately, I have had a lot of time to reflect...I think the reason why is because my schooling is slowly coming to an end and it time to make some tough life-altering decisions.

What have I been thinking lately (and please if you have some advice or suggestions...I would LOVE to hear it.)? My plan is to walk in May and receive my diploma and degrees the end of August. In case you are wondering- What?! Let me explain, I am a double major: History and Secondary Education/History with a minor in Social Sciences. In order to graduate with a History degree I need two semesters of a foreign language; hence this summer I am going to be cranking out Spanish I and Spanish II for my foreign language credits. So I will technically graduate at the end of the summer, but I am walking in May with my education class. In fact, I will be LEADING my education class in the graduation procession! I was chosen to receive the 2012 Outstanding Student Achievement Award! (Which is the highest honor a student at ISU can receive!-Oh and the picture above is the one that was taken to be on display in the College of Education and in all the programs...I think I look funny, but oh well-) Okay...now that I have tooted my own horn...let me explain my dilemma of decisions.

Life-Alternating Decision #1: Go On a LDS Mission

For the past 10 years I have had the desire to go on a mission. My family and close friends can attest to this...and if I could have I would have already gone. But for the past two years, I have always received answers to not go through; scholarships I have received, leadership opportunities, and with the thoughts of marriage possibilities. But a mission has always been in the back of my mind. The beginning of this year- I had planned that once I graduate I was outta here and off to serve the Lord! But once again...a couple of wrenches have been thrown into the mix. Receiving my award is one of them, don't get me wrong, I am very honored, but now with this award...this could make the difference between me getting a job or not. There aren't very many history teacher job openings. What if I waited a couple of years- would I be able to get a job or not? So...I don't know what to do....

And then it comes down to money....Going on missions are expensive! This past year, I have been unable to work, because of my internships. I will have absolutely NO money come September when I was tentatively planning on going out on my mission. In fact, because of these Spanish classes I may actually have to take out a small loan to pay for the last few credits of my education! So....I don't know what to do...

Life-Alternating Decision #2: "Try" to Get a Job Teaching

At this time in my education, I should be excited and anxious to get a job teaching- but to be perfectly honest...I don't know if I even want to teach! It so hard and I'm so scared! I don't think I will be a good teacher or have the energy to do everything! In a lot of ways, I want a job that I can just do from 9-5 and not have to worry about anything once I get home. Teaching is different. Teachers put in so much energy and time into their students and lessons. Teachers spend many sleepless nights worrying about certain students and how they can make their subject come to life...believe I KNOW! I don't know if I can continue to do this...don't get me wrong, it is rewarding at times and I love my students- but it so hard! And most likely, I will end up getting job somewhere far away- and that is scary too! So...I don't know what to do....

I guess what I am saying, is I have absolutely no idea what to do! I'm completely stressed out! I feel like I am choosing between the "good, better and best" but have no idea which is which. I feel like the Lord in a way is saying all is good- do what you want. But then I feel like, by receiving this award, my decision should be made up: Teach! So...I don't know what to do...

Advice, PLEASE!!!!!

"Thirteen Reasons Why"

This past week, my best friend gave me this book to read. Although she had never read it, she had heard that it was good. I have read tons of books in my life, some funny, some adventurous...and for the most part all entertaining. But never had I read a book that has made me think so much about how I interact with people. Let me explain...

"Thirteen Reasons Why," is about a girl who commits suicide, but before she dies, she records the stories (or interactions) she's had with people who have impacted her life and had helped her make the decision to end her own life. Thirteen people to be exact.

I have to preface, that I do recommend this book- but warily. Suicide is a tough subject, and this book has made me think how I have treated people or not treated them....meaning, how I have not reached out to some people.

I guess, this book really hit home because I am student teaching right now. I did have a student who tried to commit suicide and (luckily) was unsuccessful. I have personally known three people who have committed suicide. Why didn't I reach out to help them...Did I see the warning signs...Why didn't I show them that I cared more?

This post may sound like rambling, but I decided that I needed to write this down somewhere, so that months down the road or even years later, I can look back and remember how I felt after reading this book. To me, this book wasn't so much about a girl who took her own life, but more about affect we have on people; positive or negative. Each interaction, however small, makes a difference. I want to make the difference.